HERITAGE

It so happened that all marriages happened in the same caste at the same time. And people dwelled in the streets and homes to be connected, unlike phones today. Somehow, there was a swarm of people visiting their home in Walkeshwar. It was unusual for her father to get so many visitors. All the people visiting were from the Soni caste and were asking if the little girl who was working on gold jewelry was an eligible bachelor. It was denied as she had to continue her studies.

A young boy and his friend also visited this house. The friend knew the father and introduced the young boy as a person of a different caste. The girl's brother noticed them coming and asked her not to come out to avert any matrimonial offers. So she didn't. But as they left, the mother and her beautiful daughter stood outside the balcony. And that was enough for this young boy to catch a glimpse.

Outside the theater, this young boy introduced himself as Dinesh and told them that they belong to the same caste and proposed to marry the girl, as the brother suspected. After checking just the boy's background, the father accepted the offer. It was unfortunate to see that the girl was informed, not asked.

The newscaster walked out of the house and people flocked in. They all chimed in about the family that the girl was about to get married to.

"Did you check about the household you are giving your child to? The family's culture is exactly opposite to what your culture is."

"But, the boy is entrepreneurial and knows all the jewelry manufacturing works!"

"The family's values are lost. They are not as god fearing as you are. You do not know what is coming for your daughter if you get her married to the boy."

The father had seen this little girl as the light and melody of her house. The most adored child was due to be married in a house that doesn't have any semblance of security for his child.

"What have I done to my own daughter! If there had not been 13 (?) daughters to marry in the extended family, her being the 2nd. This will be a disgrace to the family to withdraw, and how will the other daughters get married?"

When the girl was in 11th grade, they got engaged. This meant a break in her studies. After 1 year and 4 months, a constant swarm of emotions and stress in the father regarding the fate of his precious daughter, led to a paralysis attack on the day of marriage. but nothing could be stopped. Liabilities had to be written off.

The roles in a matrimonial alliance have been changing and will continue to change around the world. It intends to create solidarity but can end up being disbalanced due to a lack of social security and understanding between the people involved. The balance was broken when the daughter was considered a liability to marry off. Their personal development was butchered to stay "respectable" in society at that time.

Atrocities from the in laws in terms of physiological, mental, and financial aspects levied, combined with unawareness about the way out constitutionally, are enough to break a person. In those times, women entered a new household to sweep the floor or to bear the burden of all the household responsibilities. Dowry was and still is a cost of a 'respectful' matrimonial alliance in Indian society, despite being illegal.

Women, as whole people, are an integral part of society. It is high time that they be treated the same way. Indian society is still moving from being an inhibitor to a promoter of women's rights. DVN Group was built to bring parity and take pride in all women and men in the family.

A perplexed and sniffling 18-year-old wondering why she is sitting outside the house after being dragged from the kitchen. Why was the door shut on her face? She makes sure everyone is well fed, the house is clean, and all the needs of the house are taken care of. She gets to comb my hair once every four days! Her sister-in-law too had her only to take care of her when she had delivered her baby.

The husband works day and night to get the income flowing into the house. I wonder where it is all spent, and there are always dues to pay. Why do I and my husband only have to satiate ourselves with leftovers at the end of the day?

I understand that they want no harm to come to me. That is why whenever I come from my father's house with any jewelry, they safely keep it from me in the bank locker. That will be so useful in my kids' education.

Why can't I murmur my morning prayers as I cook? Why did I get ridiculed by my sister-in-law for being spiritual?

"Hello, can I talk to Sudha, please?' Her father called her after she had moved out.

"What do you have to tell your daughter? Hurry and tell us; we will let her know." Her father didn't come to know till 3-4 months later that her daughter had shifted to a shack in Vasai. After letting them go, they do not step back from their responsibilities as the son and daughter-in-law of the house. So much so that their pickles and societal relations were maintained by them. Their bills are paid by her husband.

Even after doing all this, her father had to face a paralysis attack to come and visit me in Vasai. There was now a way she could reach him, or even had a thought to reach him. They had to leave with nothing and build with nothing. Her father trusted my ability to build and do anything on my own. Her Bhabhi's, when they visit, cannot see my brothers cry as they trot back in their cars. They had never seen their sister in such a condition.

In a basket of crabs, when one of them tries to get out of it, the other will pull it down. She needed to get out regardless.

"But, he is just 6 months old. Let's wait until Dewar Ji gets married. It doesn't look good if the elder brother has left the family."

"If you want to stay in this house, you can. But if you do, I will never see your face again."

Early in the morning, a 23 year old girl with a two year old, one year old and a six month baby finds herself sitting at the Vasai Station. As the trains fly past, her pallu shows a tear. The six month old is weeping in the soiled wrapping that she pulled rushing out of that house.

"Stay here with the kids, I will go find a place and come." And he left.

"Feed something to the kid," says an onlooker, "He cries so much, uff!"

"It's been four hours."

"If I had 5 paisa, I would have fed him a glucose biscuit."

Together, he, she, and the three kids land in a dilapidated shack in Manikpur, Vasai.

"What do we cook first in a new home?"

"Moong, Lapsi?"

"Okay. I will go get some groceries then."

A kerosene stove, some newspapers, and some moong lapsi were made. That was the first day DVN Group found a home.

Mice and scorpions would sneak in to look for food in the night.

The shanky shack used to have only one window that overlooked illegal liquor breweries and ruckus. For 12-13 houses, a common loo in the fields was infested with reptiles. There was one well for all the purposes of all these families. No fixtures or plumbing. One pitcher of water was used for drinking.

She was scared that the kids would get misled by watching this from the beginning. Rather, they closed the windows.

As ghungroos to a payal, and her three kids used to ring around as shadows. Every morning at the bauli, she used to bathe them one by one and ask them to sprint towards home, while washing clothes and dishes.

On one harsh day, she asked the second kid to go and ask the mill man to give them the flour that is collected after he sweeps the floor at the end of the day. The kid was asked, Why? He was told to tell me it cleans utensils well. But in reality, it will be a meal for two days. The kids used to gaze at the mother while she fed them Chapati with water mixed with salt and pepper.

"Mast hai na?!" She used to exclaim. This would light up their faces as they revolved around their mother, taking one bite at a time.

Go borrow two bindas from the vegetable vendor.

Mom asks the one year old.

Why do you need only two? Ask the vendor.

Mummy must need it for something, I don't know. She will give you the money when she comes to buy other vegetables later. Hurry, she'll be waiting for me.

She fed the kids and her husband and never made them feel that there wasn't enough for all. She wanted to take away the troubles of the house so that everyone could think of bringing prosperity into the house. This all meant she fasted most days.

Devi Chandraghanta signifies the clarity that guides the way despite the world's changes, like the phases of the moon.

"Why do you eat like this?' Other kids used to ask them when they saw them eating frugally.

She urges the parents to tell the kids not to bring it up to her. The etchings of childhood rarely fade with time. Living in a chawl, people do not have the headspace to teach much about emotional sensitivity. Therefore, she used to call the kids and instill sensitivity in them. She used to say that the circumstances might not be in our favor right now, but we are people with rich cultural backgrounds.

As a 23 year old mother who used to go get kids in the rain, men on the streets used to catcall her.

"Why are you getting drenched in the rain? Come under my umbrella, I will take you where you want to go."

Or, "Bhabhiji, you never come to visit us. Come sit with me. I have got a chair for you." The landlord used to say.

Any of these comments did not deter her courage, and she has, ever since, respectfully shut them down. Her speech was her only weapon.

The Soni community in Sindh was plagued by poverty. Their hard labor was never enough to feed all the people. Worn out by their lives, they turned to the Hinglaj Temple and prayed to the goddess for help. One day the Goddess incarnated and taught the skill of making jewelry to the people, which led to the prosperity of the community.

As they separated from the family, the father in law spread a bad word about the husband. This rendered the skills useless for the time being. Nobody in the market will give them business. A change in occupation became a necessity.

Oe day, a friend came calling for her. "Sudha, come with me. Kerala Samaj Camp has organized tailoring classes for women for free. Let's go check it out!"

What would you like to learn? Asks the instructor.

"Want to sew my kids' uniforms. Teach me that first?" With joy, she began learning to cut, and in no time other mothers asked her to sew for their children, which supported the house too.

"Listen, do one thing for me? Will you buy me a Sewing machine if you win?" She requests it earnestly.

The husband had placed a bet on the 1983 Cricket World Cup. If he wins, he has promised to buy the sewing machine. And India won.

While walking back to the house with the sewing machine in one hand, they passed a real estate office and decided to pay a visit. The house with basic comforts was still something they had to build.

"Where are you building flats these days? Will there be roads till the time you finish construction? What are the prices that you have thought of?"

"Yes yes, there will be. But the booking amount required for Rs. 90,000 is 1000 bucks."

"Here take 100 and book it. We will pay as and when. Do not give us the possession until the whole amount has been paid."

"But.."

"Book it or let us go then."

After every 100-200 rupees was collected, it used to be deposited at the builders office. In 1983, they found home on Diwali.

She asks him to go around the market and see if he can find business. Small work will be a great help too! She could use what she had learned at her father's house and her husband's skills to get back into jewelry manufacturing.

Mangalsutra, Or Kanthi, is the sacred thread tied around the bride's neck, symbolizing the union of Shiva as a gold center and Shakti as black beads. Innovation in design flourished as they found a business making mangalsutras. The Koli Samaj has very high reverence for a Kanthi, and they make sure that they have the best and most heavy looking designs. The patchwork of gold and black beads in the strings was introduced by her, and it went vogue in the market. Big retailers used to come and collect their orders as soon as the stocks sold off. They now had the job of pleasing all the retailers.

They started by manufacturing on their own and then bought a one and a half storey shop where two Karigars used to sit and cater to the whole Zaveri bazaar's Kanthi business. So much so that her husband started to be called Dinesh Kanthi.

They promoted entrepreneurship in a tea delivery guy, Sonya, who used to sit after work to observe how to make jewelry for hours. Not only did he learn the work, but he also ended up educating many of his family members and expanding his own jewelry manufacturing unit eventually.

Money flew to pay dues for the in-laws time and again. Burdened with all the responsibilities of the in-laws family, she had to take care of the past persecutors as her own. Or else they will come and hamper the peace of her own small family. Once, the condition of the family's in-laws was so bad that a ten year old Kid with cash was sent to all grocers, milkmen, and paan walas in the area to pay off the arrears.

Miracles happen in mysterious ways, and people find you in the most unexpected ways.

Looking for a business opportunity, She, her husband, and another couple visited a trader in Valsad. They couldn't find the trader, but they were stopped by a follower of a priest.

"Ask them to stop. I have some work for them."

Looking at the setting sun, the husband says, "Nevermind him. I don't know who he is or what he wants. We will miss the train."

He says, '"Wait, I have some work for you. You won't miss the train. Did you see the Sai Baba Temple on your way?"

Yes, we did. What about it?"

"You have to make a silver-lined throne for Sai Baba."

"We are not in the business of silver nor of making thrones. Whatever it is, rush; we will miss our train."

"Go rushing now. But it's only you who will make the throne for Shri Sai."

...

"This hermit is not leaving my head alone. It''s been 5 days that he has been coming to my dreams and asking, When will you make the throne? I am done with this now. You only tell me what to do." The husband is frustrated.

"Let's leave it on Him now. He will make us his hands."

And they bumped into a childhood friend of his who used to make Silver thrones set over wooden frames. They rush to Valsad and get the work started.

...

An intuition asked the husband to go visit the place where the work for the throne was happening. As they reach there, they find the hermit and the crew waiting for them. The hermit proclaimed, "I told you to stop. Someone is expected to visit us. The throne didn't have to leave without them doing a Pooja. The truck driver said, "Thank goodness, you arrived. The hermit won't let us move, and it gets dangerous to travel at night bearing valuables."

The Hermit is still remembered by the Choksi family for being the guiding light in dark times. He was the Gadipati of one of the Jyotirlingas that can only be attained by mastering one of the four Vedas.